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ascifilullaby

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[huh, what?]

i don't know why i'm writing this. [01 Mar 2006|02:03pm]
it just seems like an appropriate thing to do when you're lying on your roof in your swimsuit and eating watermelon, pretending it's summer just because it's 80 degrees outside. what can i say, i'm an escapist.

[huh, what?]

[09 Feb 2006|09:24am]
it's kind of sad when you know that half the population only talks to you because of hip-to-waist ratio. we are all so simple.

[ 3 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[30 Jan 2006|09:09pm]
melissa to andrast
More options 5:02 pm (4 hours ago)

I'm not up for cults right now. Try me again in about twenty years.

Reply Forward





Andras Tompa to me
More options 5:31 pm (3½ hours ago)

Hello Melissa,

Sorry but I don't know about the cult you are referring to (if you're talking about Scientology, that's quite the opposite of that: http://faq.scientology.org/page37.htm).

I did take you off our mailing lists per your request.

Best,
Andras Tompa, Bridge Publications, Inc.

[huh, what?]

conversation with my always gloomy gay friend [07 Dec 2005|11:53am]
a scifi lullaby: maybe you will find winter romance!
jrcapetillo158: no i am not lucky enough
a scifi lullaby: psh, there's no such thing as luck
jrcapetillo158: i know, or a love life for me
a scifi lullaby: well, same here
jrcapetillo158: right i dont see why
a scifi lullaby: i'm just hoping i'll get winter ass, it seems a lot more plausible
jrcapetillo158: thats cool, i am sure you will
a scifi lullaby: i think i just wanted to say winter ass
a scifi lullaby: i just said it outloud, it was funny
jrcapetillo158: your stupid
a scifi lullaby: haha, it's YOU'RE

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[04 Dec 2005|06:05pm]
it's becoming really difficult for me to function. i'm weak. i sleep at least 7 hours every night, regardless of what time i go to sleep. i'll hear my alarm to wake up for class or work, but i'll turn it off. i have no motivation to get out of bed. i have maybe three friends at school. i don't know how many i have left at home anymore. no one calls me. everyone else who talks to me only wants to have sex with me. i'm 18. am i really supposed to be feel so jaded and used up by now? i always feel like i've been crumpled up and thrown away, like a ragdoll.

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

cheer up goth fattie. [19 Oct 2005|03:43am]

[huh, what?]

i'm SEXXXY, haha [15 Oct 2005|04:08pm]
take this quiz to see if you are

[ 8 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[14 Oct 2005|11:15am]
1. Reply with your name and I will write something random about you and something random about ME.
2. I will then tell you what pretentiou foreign ssong/movie reminds me of you (or if there is none (who am I kidding) perhaps something else).
3. I will pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in (I'm gonna leave this one alone).
4. I will say something that only makes sense to you and me (or just me).
5. I will tell you my first memory of you ("It all starts when the nuclecule comes out of its nest...").
6. I will tell you what animal you remind me of ("Free the tiger!"). It will most likely NOT be a Moulin Rouge reference.
7. I'll then ask you something that I've always wondered about you (Really, I've probably spent a good deal of time in the Batlab trying to solve the conundrum).
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your blog. (or don't, whatever) Also, I'm gonna tell you what I think you should be for Halloween.

[ 6 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

yay z00!!! [25 Sep 2005|11:45pm]
[ mood | geeky ]

on friday i took a trip to the san antonio zoo rainforest education centerCollapse )

[note: edited for political correctness]

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

vive devolution! [22 Sep 2005|01:39am]

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

i love myspace [13 Sep 2005|06:07pm]
read this from the bottom up



From: Eric
Date: Sep 13, 2005 3:35 PM
Body: alright then have a good day year whatever.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: meli$$a
Date: Sep 11, 2005 11:24 PM

i doubt your ability to satisfy.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Eric
Date: Sep 11, 2005 3:07 PM

we should meet up sometime im willing to do anything to satisfy

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: meli$$a
Date: Sep 8, 2005 8:50 AM

i like any type of swinging, really. i'm a very diverse girl. usually it's pretty stimulating, but sometimes i just like to get high.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Eric
Date: Sep 8, 2005 5:39 AM

so do you like swinging? how exciting is it for you? or do you just like getting high? what kind of swinging do you like?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: meli$$a
Date: Sep 8, 2005 3:31 AM

oh, let me tell you, i get pretty high most of the time.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Eric
Date: Sep 7, 2005 10:28 PM

i see well how are you doing i guess if nothing else it never hurts to make more friends. i dont have many here anymore. so how high do you swing?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: meli$$a
Date: Sep 7, 2005 4:48 PM

i like swinging in parks and backyards, so duh.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Eric
Date: Sep 7, 2005 3:52 PM

are you truly a swinger?

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[06 Sep 2005|01:35am]
katy next weekend.

[ 2 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

college = 73% lame. [31 Aug 2005|12:32pm]
last night me, my roommate, and this guy who won't come out of the closet smoked out of a coke can because the joint we tried to roll was a failure. it was ghetto. from smoking a little bit of okay, but not great, shit the other two turned into the goofiest motherfuckers i've ever seen. they ate all the rest of my quesadillas, a bag of popcorn, and nachos. while that was going on, the fat canadian on my floor stumbled into our room drunk from a pool party, made a cheese sandwhich in the microwave, of which he spilled half the cheese on the floor, before proceeding to go knock on every other door on the floor where most others were sleeping. it was 2 am.

[ 3 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[17 Aug 2005|11:23pm]
tomorrow's my last day before moving and i don't know how i feel so i'm not going to finish this

[ 2 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

ATTN: [11 Aug 2005|09:34am]
i can't believe i'm posting this, but if you are one of the select individuals that owes me money, bring it by my house TODAY. it doesn't matter what time it is, and if you don't want to talk to me you can just leave it under the welcome mat, i really don't care.

[huh, what?]

[12 Jul 2005|09:05am]
breaking?

[ 4 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[10 Jul 2005|04:20pm]
anyone want to hook me up with a job?

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[02 Jul 2005|09:37am]
[ mood | drained ]

last night i discovered that bacardi and an empty stomach don't mix, got tipsy and blatantly flirted with the guy my friend likes in front of her, took my shirt off outside, and vomited all over the patio and john's car.
and what pissed me off was that everyone, including a cop, was really nice to me even though i was gross and getting sick everywhere. they just said "aww, they shouldn't of poured you that strong a drink, you're tiny" and rubbed my back.
i hate people acting in a patronising manner towards me!!!!#@#@#@@22222222222222

today i woke up at 7 am to go pick up my car and when i came home i found a flattened hard piece of bread in my bed that i started eating last night to settle my stomach. gross gross gross

[huh, what?]

[16 Jun 2005|12:51pm]
i'm not going to miss you.

[huh, what?]

as requested [16 Jun 2005|12:41pm]
List your six favorite songs and then pick six other people to do the same.

1. leonard cohen - everybody knows
2. sneaker pimps - the fuel
3. ac acoustics - crush
4. suede - europe is our playground
5. and you will know us by the trail of dead - clair de lune
6. placebo - then the clouds will open for me

i'm not picking 6 people, it's a free for all.

[huh, what?]

[05 Jun 2005|10:16pm]
i hope i get through this phase before college starts so that i won't end up flunking out. i fear though, that it'll just get worse.

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

ooooooooooh, i'm taking up your friends page. [27 May 2005|03:20am]
-- Name: melissa
-- Birthdate: april 29
-- Birthplace: katy, TX
-- Current Location: Katy, TX
-- Eye Color: brown [blue contacts though, i cheat]
-- Hair Color: brown
-- Righty or Lefty: lefty
-- Zodiac Sign: taurus
-- Innie or Outtie: innie.

Describe.
-- Your heritage: 5/8ths italian, then a little of german, french, scottish, english, and a tiny bit of swedish..
-- The shoes you wore today: my black heels, the "stripper/hooker shoes"..
-- Your hair: annoyingly curly, usually pushed back into line by my chi straightener.
-- Your eyes: small and dark, bleh.
-- Your fears: failing, rejection, being buried alive.
-- Your perfect pizza: green olives, grilled chicken, onions, feta cheese, tomatoes, jalapenos, and stuffed crust.

What is
-- Your most overused phrase: phrase? hmm... "i'd hit that" or "go die" or something along the lines of those, sometimes i attempt to be creative.
-- Your thoughts first waking up: %%%%%%%%%%
-- The first aspect of the opposite sex: eyes
-- Your best physical feature: i guess i'm not fat and my arms are okay because... they're not fat. oh, i have nothing.
-- Your bedtime: when i get sleepy.
-- Your most missed memory: it probably involves eating tortilla chips or something.

You Prefer
-- Pepsi or coke: gross.
-- McDonald's or Burger King: Mcdonalds has better fries.
-- Single or group dates: single.
-- Adidas or nike: asics
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: lipton
-- Chocolate or vanilla: dark chocolate
-- Cappuccino or coffee: cappuccino
-- Boxers or briefs: nothing

Do You…
-- Smoke: yes :/
-- Cuss: usually in a joking manner
-- Sing well: no, and i don't plan on attempting it.
-- Take a shower everyday: usually
-- Have a crush: is it on YOU???
-- Who are they: who are they, where are THEY WHY CAN'T BLA BLA
-- Want to go to college: well, i have to. yes.
-- Like high school: naw.
-- Want to get married: i think so, eventually.
-- Type w/ your fingers on the right keys: no, i have my own special way of typing.
-- Believe in yourself: no, i don't exist.
-- Get motion sickness: i did when i was really young, it was gross.
-- Think you're attractive: no, i sometimes think i'm okay though, which most people don't.
-- Think you're a health freak: hahaha
-- Get along with your parents: not really. i mean, they haven't kicked out or anything though.
-- Like thunderstorms: i don't mind them if they don't interfere with my plans for the day.
-- Play an instrument: i wish! i want to play the mandolin and the harp.

In the past month, did/have you
-- Done a drug: yeah
-- Made Out: yes
-- Go on a date: no
-- Go to the mall?: haha, at least 3 times a week [the job]
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: mmmm oreos.... no.
-- Eaten sushi: nope
-- Been on stage: i've stood on a stage.
-- Been dumped: no
-- Gone skating: no, i wish.
-- Made homemade cookies: no
-- Gone skinny dipping: no
-- Dyed your hair: no
-- Stolen anything: yep
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing?: strip dominoes, haha.
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes
-- Been caught "doing something": doing what?
-- Been called a tease: yeah, i wish i could remember what the exact phrase was, it was bad.
-- Gotten beaten up: no, actually.
-- Shoplifted: yes
-- If so, did you get caught: no
-- Changed who you were to fit in: no, but i act different around different people sometimes, but not on purpose.

The future
-- Age you hope to be married:???? 25-27?
-- Numbers and Names of Children: possible: abortion
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: in a little garden.
-- How do you want to die: in my sleep on my 40th birthday.
-- Where you want to go to college: i'd have preferred going as far as possible, but i'm going to trinity u.
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: happy
-- What country would you most like to visit: right now, i'm thinking brazil.
-- Best eye color?: greenish blue.
-- Best hair color? black
-- Short or long hair?: longish
-- Best height: for a guy or girl? not too tall or short.
-- Best weight: 5 lbs underweight, haha.
-- Best articles of clothing: heels and t-shirts.
-- Best first date location: cafe
-- Best first kiss location: bed

Number of
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: types? maybe 4
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: not even myself
-- Number of CDs that I own: quite a few
-- Number of piercings: just my ear lobes and my navel
-- Number of tattoos: none yer.
-- Number of scars on my body: i dunno, they're all pretty light.
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: haha, i regret everything after awhile

Yes or No
you keep a diary: nope
you like to cook: yes
you have a secret you have not shared with anyone: i don't keep secrets or believe in them.
you fold your underwear: no, i don't even fold my clothing.
you talk in your sleep: no one's ever told me i have.
you set your watch a few minutes ahead: i don't wear a watch.
you bite your fingernails: sometimes, but not off.
you believe in love: i believe in empathy.

Last
x. movie you watched: ummmm, i think the last movie i watch in its entirety was tie me up! tie me down!
x. song you listened to: some french song
x. song you've downloaded: i don't know, i have downloaded in quite a while
x. cd you bought: the brar.
x. person you've called: naz
x. person that's called you: trisha
x. tv show you've watched: ???
x. person you were thinking of? ME! ALL MEEEEE

Do..
x. you wish you could live somewhere: i want to live
x. think about suicide: naw
x. you believe in online dating: no, it doesn't exist.
x. others find you attractive: a few do.
x. you want more piercings: probably not.
x. you want more tattoos: yes
x. you do drugs = occassionally.
x. you smoke = yes
x. you like cleaning = i don't mind it
x. you like roller coasters: yessssss
x. you write in cursive or print = print
x. do you carry a donor card :no, i should look into that though.

Have you...
x. ever cried over a girl/boy: yes, i always cry over hermaphrodites.
x. ever lied to someone: yes, but not unless i'm really forced to. i think i lie less than the average um liar.
x. ever been in a fist fight: yes
x. ever been arrested: no.

What...
x. shampoo do you use: brillant brunette
x. cologne or perfume do you use: none, perfume gives me a headache when i have it on.
x. shoes do you wear = heels or my onitsuka tigers.
Who makes you laugh the most? the late bill hicks.
Who has the best advice?: me, i dispense it by the gallon. especially if you don't ask for it.
Who's been through the most with you?: just myself.
Most Random?: whaaaaaaa
Most could-be-mistaken-for-being-high?: a lot of kids.
Lives the closest?: naz
Have you dated and regretted?: i don't think so.
Loves ya the most?: ???

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[22 May 2005|06:57pm]
i like being around people that are so stupid that you start laughing.

[huh, what?]

[10 May 2005|03:11pm]
well i have to go to work in approximately 17 minutes, so i'll make this quick.
i'm half-watching lost in translation on teevee and i hate scarlett johansson's voice. today i got an unexcused absent for not being in photography about 4/5ths of the period, even though we weren't doing any work in there. i hope that's not truancy. i found an unfinished roll of film in my colorsplash camera, so i think i should deal with that soon, even though i have nothing to take pictures of. um, that's all.


beth, i put your letter in the mail today.

[ 9 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[03 May 2005|03:08pm]
this is totally useless. no words.

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[15 Apr 2005|11:06pm]
i miss going out to eat and having fun and complaining about boredom.
i'll be 18 in two weeks.
tralalala

[ 1 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

[11 Apr 2005|11:18pm]
i totally forgot where that boom boom boom video is, if anyone wants to hook me up with the link or at least can remember what server it was on.

[ 2 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

my browser crashed [07 Apr 2005|08:17pm]
[ mood | thirsty ]

while i was typing this entry originally, so this is probably a pale impression of the glorious stream of words i had been writing.
but anyways: lightning bolt, lightning bolt!

nothing much has been happening.................... go to school, then go to work or community service, then home, i talk my head off, and sometimes i shower and/or do my laundry [and sometimes i don't?]; i've become positively sedate. i go to sleep early on weekdays and eat too much.
i don't know how i feel half the time, but it's never anything drastic. i suppose i'm either in a constant state of "okay" or maybe it's numbness. but anyways, it's not dramatic or romantic like you know, pirates.
i do miss my car and that ladytron softcore jukebox album i can't find because apparently that remix of fannypack's "hey mami" can't be found anywhere else [at least not online]. total disappointment.

it doesn't need to be said that i need to cut and colour my hair
perhaps something like this?


or maybe not. the more blandly i look/dress the more boring i feel but it seems to help.
i really want to see this if anyone is interested, though i suppose not.

oh, and krista, if you read this i want to know what picture you're talking about!

[huh, what?]

. [28 Mar 2005|10:22am]
[ mood | fitful ]

+ i don't have a car and probably won't for a month
+ today i don't have a cellphone
+ i still have to do 18.25 hours of community service
+ i probably can't go to the college i want to because i was too stupid/unmotivated to write essays for scholarships
+ i spend too much $$$
+ i keep talking to people that aren't good friends and never will be

[ 2 fucked the pain away + huh, what?]

this is a tad creepy [22 Mar 2005|04:37pm]
the siren on our house's alarm system was not working, so today someone came by to repair it.
why wasn't it working?
someone had cut the wire in the attic with a knife.

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